Ice-skating pose

Holiday Card post!

I'm about a week later than I meant to be with this but better late than never! (I blame November in general. Let's just say that I did not win at NaNo.) Anyway, I think by now you guys know the drill. If you'd like a holiday card, just comment below with your name and address. All comments are screened.

And if you've got a post of your own, leave a link! (I still haven't watched the finale of Supernatural so I'm avoiding looking through my friends list posts. This is what happens when your town gets rid of CW from your channel list partway through the final season - but Netflix is updated so hopefully I'll be able to catch up soon!)
Captain Canary - leaning over look

Holiday card post!

Wow am I ever late! I’m not sure I’ve ever waited this long before! But I’m sure that you guys know the drill. If you’d like a card, leave your address in the comments and comments will be screened. And if you’ve got your own post, link me!
Captain Canary - leaning over look

It's been a long time

I didn't forget that I have a DW account (or even a LJ account) but I have been avoiding both - I think I just miss when people connected using one of those? I don't know, I don't have a good excuse!

I am, however, trying to get back to being on here again. I've been writing and reading and working and while I love that I'm part of group chats, etc. with writers in fandoms I'm more interested in (and I joined VM Discord after the shitshow that was season 4), I miss the sense of community that used to be so easy to find on LJ and DW.

Then, when going through old jump drives, I found a BSC snark that I'd done and I wandered over to LJ to check it out and saw that everyone had pretty much migrated to DW and I said to hell with it. Let's get back to DW. Maybe a bit of LJ because I know there's still some fandoms that are more over there than on DW.

Meanwhile, I'll keep on writing - no matter how slow updates might be sometimes! I'll keep on reading.

And I'll be trying to get RL back on track because while it's not off the rails at the moment, it's definitely not where I want it to be and a lot of that has been on me. So. Time to work on that.
Captain Canary - leaning over look

Christmas Card Post

I'm so late with this, I know! But that doesn't mean that I forgot.

So, as usual, if you'd like a card (and actually, they're not specifically Christmas this year) then please let me know by leaving your address in the comments. As usual, comments are screened so that no one else can see your info.

And if you've done a card post, please leave a link!
Captain Canary - leaning over look

Christmas Card post!

I'm later than I'd like to be with this but I'm earlier than I was a few years ago when I made the post in freaking December, so I think that this counts as a win. But anyway! I'm going to start sending cards out, hopefully within the next few weeks to be sure everyone gets one, so if you'd like a card, leave your name and address (yes, it can just be the username if you're more comfortable with that, no worries) as well as whether you want a Christmas or holiday card in the comments. I'll be screening them so no one else will see your personal info.
Sara - smile

I have no clever titles

I feel like I should have clever titles for my entries though. Damn.

I've been doing much better the last couple of weeks. Not working myself too hard and I've been writing. Even though I'm not editing my VM fic when I post it at AO3 (such a challenge not to - I've reread it as I've posted and some of it is like "No, why did I do that? His actions get paired with HIS dialogue, not hers, omg."), people have been great about it. It's nice to see that my writing didn't totally suck back then, lol.

Still, one day I might edit the hell out of a lot of them and see if I can improve on them.

Either way, it's gotten me back to reading VM fic and wanting to write some, which is quite possibly the weirdest thing of all? I don't know.

And I'm still working my way through my list of Captain Canary fic that I want to write. I need to find my list though because I moved it and now I don't remember where I moved it to. Kind of like the notebook that I was using then finished - I had half a story started in there, maybe more, and it continued to the new notebook but now I can't find the old one and I hadn't typed up the fic yet. Ugh. That's annoying. Either way, I finally finished Chelle's birthday fic last month (her birthday was in June, that's so awful, I took forever with it) and I finished the next part of the Multiverse series. Next up, I think I'll write more of the HP fusion/crossover and there's also two more soulmate AUs that are nearly finished. Plus the tragedy of the next Earth in the Multiverse series.

I've got another series planned out but I haven't done much with it. I've got part of the first story of the series written but I've actually stuck to not posting this one. So far, I've plotted out at least 3 stories in this with the option of a 4th. I'm leaning towards yes on there being a 4th part but we'll see.

I have no idea if voting for the Captain Canary Awards are still going because I've been absent from Tumblr except to reblog a few random posts but I was nominated again in a couple different categories and that's awesome enough, especially since I wasn't expecting it.

And last, but certianly not least, I got the day off that I requested for next month which is excellent because otherwise I'd have faked being sick to not go because that's the day my best friend [profile] mibelladeseo, her younger brother, and I are driving up to Denver so we can see RENT the next day. I'm so excited to be able to finally see the stage version! I can't wait!
Veronica - chillin' like a villain

There we go, back on DW too

And now I've gotten my icons updated on DW and made sure entries will crosspost, I think I'm set. Though I probably should have done this months ago because now DW is missing a few entries but I can't remember how to fix that so I suppose it'll just stay that way.

I'm getting back in to looking up some writing comms - I've already signed up for [community profile] hc_bingo and I'm looking at a few others. I miss doing those and a lot of the ones I used to get involved with for weekly prompts don't seem to be active anymore, which is a shame since it looks like at least one of them was active up until just a few weeks ago. Those comms were always great for the muse!

Meh, I'll figure it out. Meanwhile, I'm slowly getting my VM fic posted at AO3 though I'm just posting them as is and including the original post date in a note. It's a bit fun to see how my writing has changed over the years, considering I wrote those back in 2005/2006!

Happy Friday, folks! I'm going to bed. I have to be up in like 5 hours but I got caught up in icons and writing a new Captain Canary (or rewriting the start - I can't find the notebook with the original start). Oops.
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Brothers Winchester

Return of the SPN moodtheme!

What a pain in the ass to upload though. Still, I'm happy to be back to early seasons Winchesters.

But, seriously, that was a pain in the ass so unless I suddenly find one of LoT or something equally awewsome, this is staying for a good long while!

That being said, it was also a nice distraction because it was my brother's birthday today (well, yesterday technically - it's after midnight here). I stayed home because I've been getting shorter and shorter on patience all week (Monday was the anniversary of my dad's death too) and I just knew I wouldn't be able to handle getting bitched at over the phone or having to repeat myself five hundred times because they're not listening or whatever.

Instead, I got a bit more done in organizing the shelves in my office and then I went to the mass that had been dedicated to my brother. After that, we met up at my grandparents's house to eat the cake my mom had made.

I'm so glad it's Friday. I'm ready for this week to be over.
Nicole - Gryffindor colors

And back

I dropped off of LJ for awhile, mostly stuck to chatting with people. I didn't really want to deal with life.

My brother passed away at the beginning of April. I'm mostly dealing with it but I still have days where I just start crying. I was on my way home the other day and went passed the Baskins Robbins he took me to the last time I saw him and just completely broke down and started crying. Didn't stop for the next 30 minutes. Hell, I'm starting to cry right now just thinking about it. The littlest things make me think of him and then I just cry and I have no idea when that's going to stop.

A month later, one of my cousins killed himself when his depression became too much. We weren't close, hell, we hadn't spoken in years. We hung out when we happened to be in the same town but it was still horrible to hear. But it still makes me sad because I remember him as a kid and he was always laughing and running around and I hate that that changed for him.

Most recently, I worked myself to the point of sickness. Going in early, staying late. And now I've been sick for over a week and because where I work doesn't give separate bereavement leave, I had to use my sick leave after my brother died. So I've been going in to work because I've got basically no sick leave left.

I didn't feel like writing for pretty clear reasons but I also wanted to try and use writing as a way to deal. Didn't really work, I mostly ended up reading for the next month and nothing else and it's just been in the last month or so that I've started getting really back in to things. I'll have to catch up on posting some of those to LJ soon. And I'm forever grateful to the Legends Crew because they're some of the only people that have been able to really make me smile and haven't made me feel weird about going quiet and then just popping back in whenever I'm ready. Legends fandom in general has been pretty great.

Still, I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of feeling sad. I'm tired of having to put on a happy face on days when I feel anything but. I'm tired of people that I'm supposed to be able to trust using me.

I suppose I'm just waiting for things to start getting better again.